Costumes and "letting the clothes fit you!" Faceless Businesswoman #4

What is your Job Title?

I like to call myself a Costume Stylist and a Personal Stylist; it’s normally called a Costume Designer but I feel like the way I approach my work is closer to styling than designing right now because I do very little from scratch in terms of making costumes. I do a lot more of trying to shop for the character, so Costume and Personal Stylist.

Is that by choice you’re doing more shopping or is that by necessity from the industry?

Both. So what happens is there are budget constraints, obviously. And making costumes is more expensive than buying costumes. But there’s also the way I approach my work, which is, I do a lot more contemporary character work instead of historical period films or fantasy or something like that - Where there is a need to one hundred percent do things from scratch. I feel like there’s a certain beauty in trying to make sure your character looks exactly as they’re supposed to.

So you know if I am doing a character I like to think like “okay, what does their wardrobe look like? What are their colors? What do they reach for more often? What are their day clothes, what are their nice clothes? What do they wear at home? What do they wear when they go on a date? What do they reach for when they are feeling happy or feeling sad?” - Things like that. I like to figure out what brands they would shop at, where would they shop? - And then go ahead and do that. I guess that’s where it comes down to styling; like when I do personal work for people also, this is what I help them figure out - What helps them dress well and dress like the way they want to. And what do they want to reach for, and also make them want to actually reach for their clothes.

Did you get a degree, and if so is it directly related to your field, if no, what is your degree in?

I did, in the smallest way possible really - I did a Fashion and Apparel Design Degree. Which is what is available in the country (India); we don’t have a degree for costume work, nor do we have a degree for personal styling or image consulting. So I did Fashion and Apparel Design which gave me a very good knowledge base that I could help people from.

How long have you worked in your industry?

Since 2015, so it’s been about eight years.

Did you get started with school or did you get started another way?

I did school; I knew I only wanted to work with clothes. So I went on to do my degree in it, and then during the course of my degree, and the year after that, I did internships in the various industries that surround clothes. Actually, many think that it’s one, but it’s really, the fashion industry works differently from the apparel industry, which works differently from the production house (where your jeans are made for example - the factory itself). I did internships at all of them, I did an internship at Lee to see how jeans are designed. But I didn’t enjoy any of it - but I still enjoyed clothes themselves.

Then I went on to try to do my Masters at the National Institute of Design. It didn’t quite work out for me, though the Institution is wonderful, I dropped out from there. I’ve always loved film, always. Like, too much! My family is very film obsessed. So when I was dropping out, I put out a call to everyone I knew, (everyone!), saying “if you know anyone who works in costume, could you put me in touch? I want to try this out now, this is the next version”. And I got very very lucky that someone I knew, knew somebody who was a minor actor at that time. When they got the message they were on a set so they stepped out and spoke to the costume designer and asked if they would take in someone. And she is my mentor, Sayli Soman, who's always been there for me. That’s how I met her, she taught me everything about the costume side of my job. While I was doing that, I developed a lot of my own theories about how you dress yourself up as a person and how you shop for someone, and that’s how I launched into Personal Styling.

What do you wish people knew about either Personal Styling or Costume?

What I wish people knew about costume is that it's not just being fashionable, it’s not just clothing fantasy in a very fashion-forward film like Clueless. There are films that you wouldn’t even consider for brilliance in costume design, for example like Baby Driver. Which was sheer genius in how it shows character progression and character design through clothing. But the genius is also because you never notice the costume design. Because it’s helping the character be themselves so much that you don’t need to notice what they’re wearing. I guess it would be nice for people to see that, like films aren’t just amazing acting and if you love what a character is wearing try not complimenting the actor but figuring out who dressed them.

About personal styling I guess; there is a version of everyone in their head and it’s okay to reach for that. It’s okay to ask for help with that. None of us, including me, dress the way we want to in our heads.

What advice would you give someone looking for their place in your industry?

Figure out how to maintain your boundaries. But also understand it will be really difficult when you are starting and you are working for other people. The thing with our industry is there is a lot of creativity and there is a lot of execution and you are simultaneously on all sides of it. So people do get brain waves in the middle of the night and then they will send you that instruction or whatever and it’s eleven at night! Unless you know that instruction has to happen at seven in the morning, there’s really no need for you to answer that call. They can write a note or just tell you the next morning. Just have that boundary. Work-life balance is hard in the industry, but at least keep your nights to yourself. Boundaries, it’s taken me a long time. It’s so hard - because the industry has such a hustle culture, and we work sixteen hours a day - but you work, for example, so you can eat well and sleep well, if you skip lunch, if you skip sleeping well, then what is any of this for? Why are you working? Might as well not.

What do you think are essential qualities for someone to possess if they are interested in working in your industry?

Curiosity. Someone that is constantly curious because you will always see people around you. Note what people are wearing, don’t judge them for it, accept that this is what this person wears and see how you can bring that to life when it becomes relevant.

Also, I think there’s something beyond saying hard work, I am not saying other people are not hard-working, but the ability to stay “on” for a longer period of time. Because everybody goes on at different times on the set for example, like it’s after you finish your work that the cinematographer and that department are working, and you still have to be on at that time, but you are not working. It’s different, like you are not actively thinking, but you have to be on to notice if there is something wrong that you need to flag. So there is a skill to staying “on” that you need - if you can do that, you would be great at this job.

What is the hardest part of your career/industry/job for you?

Networking. Networking is really hard for me, I barely ever have time for colleagues. For the first time, I am going to have work colleagues come home next weekend. I’m so of the “come home and leave work at work” mindset that it almost hurts me at work, because people like to work with their friends and when they want to recommend someone, they recommend someone they like working with and for that, you need to be friends with them. I am terrible at networking and need to do this better. With personal styling, I love helping people shop - people do recommend that, and then if you don’t stay in touch with the person they sometimes forget that you did this for them.

What is the most fun part of your career/industry/job for you?

Breaking a wardrobe down to figure out exactly what it needs. It’s always fun doing your reference research, putting those pieces together, and seeing what way someone can stand out. A lot of times people don’t know what they need, they know only once you show them - “these are the options, which would you prefer?” So trying to get that, by getting the personality right - whether it’s personal shopping or for costume design.

If you could change one thing about your business/industry what would it be?

I think I would change the way we approach timings. There’s often very little turnaround time between days, when you’re working consecutive days, you just have enough time to come home, sleep, and go the next day. It’s just enough normally. This is not just here, from everything I’ve heard this happens in Hollywood as well. It’s not safe and not good for anybody. And you’re not working at your peak - people need time to recharge. Everyone needs good sleep, everyone needs time when they’re not thinking of work.

If you could do it all over again would you still want to end up where you are now?

I think I would like to end up slightly further along. I think there are things I have done that slowed me down, the choices I made. There were times I was scared to make leaps, and hopefully, I would be less scared the next time around.

If you could meet any businesswoman who would she be and why?

Priyanka Chopra. She seems to be handling a lot of different roles simultaneously - she works in film production, as an actress, she also does a lot of political activism, and she’s also a major investor in companies like Bumble. It requires your brain to be actively thinking of so many different things, and monitoring so many different things, and yet at least externally she seems like she has a good handle on it all. And Amber (Amber Peterson of Amber Budd Atelier, Amber Budd Skincare, and Weld(ed), I want to know how Amber works - I would love to see how she sets things up.

What is the worst advice you've ever gotten, or in hindsight given? Did the advice hinder or embolden your advances?

Remember I spoke about boundaries and timing? This person has been truly helpful and there for me a lot in terms of guiding me for work, but the worst advice I’ve ever gotten was - “If you’re getting work, you should cancel your vacation.” I took it seriously, and I took it to heart; And right now I haven’t had a vacation in three and a half years. I haven’t been on my honeymoon.

And the vacation three and a half years ago was to have our wedding. If I truly spent time thinking about the last time I took a vacation without something else attached to it, it was before I got married. So yeah, I think taking that advice was bad. There was fear involved in that advice, fear that you wouldn’t get work again so take what you can get now. That’s not good for your confidence levels; You need to feel like, “you know what, work will come”. When it comes, you’ll do it well, but it's okay to say “no” to work. I’m saying it, but I’m not implementing it well right now.

What does your typical daily schedule look like?

Whatever the day needs it to be - I’m better in the morning in terms of focus, I have ADHD, and I’ve realized that mornings are better for me. So I like to front-load any thinking tasks in the mornings and then spend the rest of my day on execution. This is true whether I am on set, I am referencing, or I am shopping for someone. I like to block things on my calendar because if I didn’t I wouldn’t know what I need to be doing right now. That includes things like, eating lunch, showering, taking a break, and drinking your tea - I have to block all of that in, otherwise - whether I was working continuously or staring at the fan I would just continue to do that. My schedule isn’t concrete, but I have time blocks all throughout the day of what I should be doing. I’m not very good at following it, but it keeps me alive! But no I don’t have a typical daily schedule, it’s why I picked my career because no day looks like the other. And it’s why I hated all the jobs before - because there is a typical daily schedule. Even if I know what I need to do on set every morning, there are so many curve balls that come your way that your plans are blown to hell five minutes in and then you have to make sure you’re holding onto your plan. ADHD LOVES set work!

What does work-life balance mean to you? And how do you personally achieve it?

Work-life balance means I get to spend time with loved ones, and also it means that my loved ones understand that if I am not spending time with them it means I am working and I’m not doing it because I don’t want to be with them. There is a need for a lot of focus on the life part, but then there also needs to be an equal understanding from your life on the work part.

How do I achieve it?

Well, it involved a lot of telling my family “listen, if I’m on set the reason I am not talking to you is because my phone has to be on silent or the sound guy would kill me.” It’s spending a lot of time and making an effort to be where your family needs you on days they really do and making a lot of those choices. I guess this one is the one I am currently struggling with - having hobbies. And having a time where it’s not about your life in terms of your family and it’s not about work - just what you want to do that day. I’ve been struggling with that one.

What does self-care mean to you? How often do you take time for self-care, or is it not important for you?

I know logically what self-care means, but most days don’t know how to balance it with everything else. I think on a daily level at this point it kind of comes down to - if I give myself time to be well dressed, and have a well packed bag that will keep me sane during the day - making sure I have everything I need during the day so I don’t feel ill-equipped to handle things is my self-care.

How do you show yourself care and compassion while ruling your world?

I didn’t know I was going to feel this attacked right now, lol. But I think at this point it’s by making a choice to be okay to spend on things that I would like and would make my life easier. Even if externally or internally it feels luxurious; Just being okay with spending on myself. I spent a long time living life on a very tight budget, very very tight budget and that warped my thinking. Making that adjustment of saying it’s okay to want things and then actually executing that. That’s where I show compassion to myself, I say “it’s okay”.

Are you a life planner or do you let it go with the flow?

I am such a heavy life planner, I would plan everything if I was given a chance - and then not execute any of it, because “ooo shiny”! But I am a life planner, and I like to plan with plenty of space for things to go to hell.

If a planner, what is the next goal you are going to hit?

To reset. I spent a few years giving my own career a backseat, because I wanted to help my husband in making a leap in his career trying to get into film, and he needed support. So I spent about five years giving my career a backseat. I feel like I am at a point where if I don’t make it front and center of my life, then I am not going to get to. So making that reset, figuring out what the structure looks like in terms of handling my business and trying to figure out how I can have funds to do it well is the next thing.

What did you want to be when you were a child?

Until I was in seventh grade I wanted to be an Archeologist. I wanted to figure out what was happening at Stonehenge, and then someone told me they already figured it out. So I got bored and said no to archeology because that was the only thing and someone got to it - imagine what could’ve happened if I got started studying and then someone figured it out?! Lol

I got very lucky with two major influences in about seventh grade. I had a cousin gift me this fashion design game that had different plates where you could put different tops and bottoms together, put different colors together and then design these clothes. And there was this girl, who is a very big designer now, Samira Laveker of TiSa. She lived on the ground floor of our apartment building and she was going to college for fashion design. From where we were playing, you could see her pin board where she would have her assignments up. I was fascinated by them constantly and that’s when I learned you could go to college for this and you could actually do this - it was not just a game, you could DO this! And that’s when I knew I wanted to work with clothes.

What else would you like to share with us?

It’s okay to spend on your clothes, and it’s okay to spend on yourself in an external way. Because what many people don’t realize is - we’ve all heard the adage “dress for the job you want, not the one you have,” but there’s an addition to it which is “you dress for the job you want, you also start feeling like you can do it!” Take help. Not saying hire me, but take the help in dressing for yourself. And don’t try to fit into clothes, let the clothes fit you.

Fun additional questions - lightning round style:

Favorite Hobby: Reading

Favorite Food: I love all food, I think one food would feel bad if I didn’t pick it.

Favorite Color: Purple, blue, and green - do you see the pattern where I can’t pick?

What’s the weirdest/funniest thing in your bag for work: A complete medical kit.

Secret Talent: I can dance without choreography

Best life hack: Meal prep! DON’T COOK EVERY DAY, it’s too much energy. Also, get a robot vacuum cleaner.

A mundane thing about you: I love drinking electrolytes. Where someone else might sit with a bottle of wine next to them, I have electrolytes.